First Watch: Tango & Cash (1989)

In the western world, Friday nights are usually spent getting hammered, eating an awful kebab, throwing up said kebab on someone's shoes, having a punch up and waking up with an itch in an unfortunate place. At least, that's how they do things in Clapham. But I digress, I did none of these things last Friday and instead chose to stay in, have a terribly unhealthy dinner (Rice Krispies FTW) and watch an 80s film I've never seen. Yes, there are some 80s films I've never seen. I hope you haven't completely lost your faith in humanity.

Unfortunately, I lost my faith in humanity about 10 minutes in to this AWFUL film. And it's not even good in a naff, 80s way. It's just shit and I want to know why Jack Palance sullied his good name with this mess. Oh well, we'll always have this.