27/01/2011

Remake Round-Up

I hate to be the bearer of bad news or become one of those douchebags who judges a film before they've seen it (I don't write for The Daily Mail) but I feel like having a bloody good rant about some possible remakes being touted around Hollywood after manifesting in the depths of hell for a while.

A Star Is Born
Rumours have been flying about this for quite sometime but the strongest indication that Clint Eastwood has finally lost his marbles came this week with news that he's definitely/maybe making a fourth, yes fourth, version. Beyonce is in talks to take the lead role because apparently she didn't offend us enough in Dreamgirls. And Austin Powers in Goldmember. And The Pink Panther. And Obsessed. She's awful.

Annie
Even as an ardent fan of musicals I cannot stand Annie. So why, I hear you ask, am I complaining about it? Well, maybe it's because Will Smith apparently has to have all of his children starring in remakes of much loved films? Maybe it's because it'll have a distinctly hip-hop sound heralded by Jay-Z? Or maybe it's because I'd prefer to see Willow Smith running around a playground like a normal 10 year old instead of releasing an album and starring in films. But that's just me.

Lethal Weapon

Never has the line "I'm too old for this shit." made more sense than it does right now. This is an awful prospect but before we all start complaining, can anyone at Warner Bros. tell me if the new Riggs will have a luscious mane like Mel did circa 1987?

Of course not.