Drive Angry 3D

You: Why has she lead with a picture of that actor from...y'know, the stuff, instead of Nic Cage driving some sweet ass ride or Amber Heard bent over a car in non-existent hotpants?

Me: Because I wanted to, bitch.

But srsly, William Fichtner is the best thing in this obvious ode to all things trashy from the sick, sick mind of Patrick Lussier. Sometime after winning an Oscar for Leaving Las Vegas and starring in a flawless action trilogy (The Rock, Con Air, Face/Off) The Cage decided to do whatever film he was offered and has since become a cult figure among film dicks who like to stay up til 5am watching his crappest films and downing a glass of Rumbena every time he does something ludicrous.

With that in mind, I wanted Drive Angry 3D to be as crap as possible but as several people have noted, it's insistence on becoming 'so bad it's good' sorta ruined all the fun. Still, jaws flying at you, The Cage killing a bunch of douchebags mid coitus and Fichtner wearing a suit and generally being a badass is no bad way to spend a drunken Friday night. And I should know.