My Dog Tulip

For 82 of My Dog Tulip's 83 minutes I was bored out of my mind. I looked at the rest of the people in the screening room with a look of utter dismay because I couldn't figure out why they were laughing so haughtily at such a tedious and droll film. But then something happened; the last minute perfectly summed up why dog will always be a man's best friend and had me fighting back tears like a pathetic loser. Je suis a dog person.

It's based on the 1956 book by J. R. Ackerley, which tells the story of his 14 year relationship with his German shepherd dog named Tulip. First of all, that is a shit name for a dog. Secondly, it's hard to care about said rubbish-named dog when he's such an asshole. And lastly, I wouldn't bother seeing this if you have little or no interest in an owner trying to find a mate for his dog and or a close up of its anus. Yeah, everyone found that utterly hilarious but me and given the rave reviews it's received, I clearly have no idea what I'm talking about. Or I'm right and everyone else is wrong. Let's go with that.