1) They become friends after hating each other for approximately 78 minutes
2) They learn something about themselves
3) The uptight one loosens up, has casual sex
4) The hefty one gets a makeover
5) One gets their life saved by the other
6) The Russian mobster they take down has a hilariously bad Russian accent like that dude in 2012
7) Sandra Bullock does that frantic fast-talking thing she always does
8) Melissa McCarthy's character is totally cool with being overweight and says so
9) A few people from Bridesmaids show up
10) No songs from Toni Braxton's album, also called 'The Heat', are played.
Meh, I'm kind of up for it.